Jethro having a pint before his rant.

Guess we have all seen the video evidence and of course the sports hacks have been all over it like lap dogs onto a saucer of cream, but come on how many of you didn't say under your breath "onya mate"! The Wellington player, term used in broadest possible way, clearly took the Magpie jumper out in the air, and the Ref ... well the Ref did nothing. Just like he did nothing with the constant off side play of the Wellington loosies all day on the paddock. Newland stepped up to the plate, disregarded his career, and dealth out some summary justice.

Don't get me wrong, I don't condone the player's action in anyway possible, why if it had of been one of the Wellington terrorists I would be calling for a season ban up front. Then again the Capital city boys are cheating scum at the best of times and not worthy of taking the field against the great Hawkeye Guys. On a side note they can stick the new name for Hawkeye up their arses, sounds like something a Marketing Exec from Helengrad would come up with to be honest. But I digress.

(Actually Dannevirke South School - but we take your point - It's Arse - Ed)

In order to be fair and unbiased I have had a crack team of twelve year old computer geeks run the game through various computer programs to determine just what really happened. Talking of those computer programs, a real black art right there kids. Sorry digressing again.

Here is our findings, and I can guarantee the NZRU will not accept this in evidence as they have a vendetta against the Bay showing up their centrefold teams. Nothing else can explain the Hawkeye Guys playing the Stags twice in two years down South on the frozen tundra that is mistakingly called a rugby pitch.

The lineout forms and Neemia Tialata can clearly be heard saying to Newland that he's switching to mungoball in 2008 and has a huge contract from the Warriors. That's a red card already in anyone's book of counted wrongs against the Bay. Newland for his part is quite happy to play the game and disregard the obvious sledging from the Capital player.

As the ball is thrown in, right down the middle as opposed to most of the Wellington throws missed by the so called Ref, Tialata moves across the line and takes out the Bay jumper. For a full ten seconds you can see the HB boys holding back and waiting on the Ref to blow up the obvious infraction. Naturally the Ref misses this as it might involve having to card one of the big team players, and it also goes fully to explaining how the Bay somehow didn't win the lineout, which they deserved to win if not for out right cheating by their opponents.

Cut forward 15 seconds and the heroic Newland has nothing on his mind other than to stampede through the Wellington forwards and reclaim the ball unfairly lost. The Bay forwards had been going through their opponents like a hot knife through butter all afternoon so nothing new there. Newland thrusts out his hand to gentle push aside some Wellingtonians loitering around obstructing, and the scheming Tialata launhes a dastardly plan. Rather then succombing to the clear superiority of the Bay player he calleously throws his head in the way in what is clearly a huge obstraction. A split second later you can see the Ref and linesman shaking their heads at Tialata's clearly illegal tactic that prevented the galant Newland from running down the Wellington inner backs and setting up a break away five pointer. For mine we should have got a penalty try right there!

The aftermath came quick and fast. First the Television talkbunnies, miffed at having their weekend picks blown out of the water by a super Bay effort, replayed the incident over and over again. Rather than focusing on just why the Bay didn't get the penalty awarded they somehow managed to concoct a "punch thrown" spin from the incident. Well guess if you quickly edit the footage, show some bad angles, then that might vaguely look to be the case here. Out of interest the Television studio isn't based in Hawkes Bay ... coincidence or not?

Then it was the turn of the Wellington Rugby Union. In a turn up to rival the spin doctoring of a Sir Clive Woodward Lions tour, or in fact the Aussies after a Bledisloe Cup lose, the WRU were almost hysteric over the incident. In fact they rather sounded like a pack of thirteen year old girls deprived of a Boy Band ticket. Anything to gloss over the fact the Lions were hammered by a supposed "minor team". Well hope they are happy now that they have dragged the game into the gutter, and allowed the anti rubgy press to go on a crusade.

Naturally the NZRU have had to take citing action in the face of an avalanche of shrill calls from all corners of the anti Bay firmament. I can only hope Mr Newland gets a fair and unbiased hearing this week, similar to what he has received here. Then again they are all biased outside the Bay and somehow a six or more week suspension will be awarded. Due process, not if you are a Hawkes Bay player! Good luck to the player, we await developments with sinking hearts.

* Posting taken from Jethro's forthcoming book "How the Bay were robbed of a Cup title for ten years". Available shortly from all good bookstores.

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Jethro our Sydney based correspondent is taking the piss. The views expressed or even the reality that Jethro is in is not necessarily those of MagpieRugby Dot Com, and most certainly not those of the HBRU. We have no idea what they think.